Will the real bae please stand up! Is it me or are other Singles like myself having a hard time finding a boo in the midst of a global pandemic? Yal I’m over it! Dating apps included. There should be an expanded set of rules that men have to follow when it comes to creating their profiles. Because if audacity and below bare minimum is an option they’re passing with flying colors. I feel as though I do a pretty good job of “presenting” myself to potential suitors, but the profiles I’ve seen for potential future bae have been horrendous. From the low grade photos to no introductions at all. On top of some feeling the need to invite me to their home in the midst of a global pandemic. Like, what we doing??

I’m trying to figure out why I spent so much of my time updating my photos and thoughtfully planning out my answers. It’s like applying for a job you’re over qualified for. Or even better, being asked to do a task above your pay grade.

In the past 3 months, I’ve tried to really give my dating life a fair chance during this pandemic and it has been responding back to me with a big fat NO. Recently, I hit it off with a guy who successfully made it pass my 48-hour trial period. He engaged me in stimulating conversation for like 6 days and then it all came crashing down. We disagreed on one of my non-negotiables. I even did the double back to verify it was a hard pass. I’ll be lying if I say that I’m fine. Truly it sucks to make a great connection and then fail to deliver.

Now at 30, I realize that having a few hard stops before I dive into the pool head first on the shallow end is inevitable. However, is it really supposed to be this difficult to find a man that I can actually spend the rest of my life with? I’ve been praying and listening to that inner knowing (aka Holy Spirit) before I get entangled into something I can’t come back from. These check-ins keep me from constantly being in a state of repair. On the other hand, I’m just trying to get chose (in a good way).

Yes, knowing my worth and what I want romantically should always be non-negotiable. However, I’ve been wondering have I been getting in my own way unconsciously or are the fish in this pool just spoiled? My life from this point forward is all about keeping promises to myself. Yal pray for me because today was one of those days.

Sincerely,

Christian, Single, and Available

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11, NIV

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